How to take over a country (without anyone making a fuss…)

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  1. Study how others have done it – perhaps by living somewhere that runs an autocratic system masquerading as a democracy.
  2. Spend some time working in a government department to find out how the system works.
  3. Test the tolerance of the system for rapid change.
  4. While you’re there test out an ideological ‘divide and conquer’ strategy – something like, say ‘traditional or progressive” – test how entrenched positions start to blind people to faults on their own side.
  5. Start to gather your allies – including a few useful idiots who will support you no matter what because they believe you’re on the same side.
  6. Retreat for a while and assess the obstacles.
  7. Identify the EU as a major block to autocracy. Remove the block.
  8. Implement your divide and conquer strategy on a much larger scale. Utilise all your study into the possibilities of utilising maths and physics to impact on social behaviours. Test the robustness of electoral law. Find it wanting (but in your favour).
  9. Identify a figurehead whose weakness is ego, who shares your values and who will do anything to hold onto power. Help them to become elected.
  10. Identify the people in your party likely to stand up to you. Expel them so that their seats become free.
  11. Test the strength of parliamentary convention and the law by proroguing parliament. Assess the impact. Evaluation suggests that the public don’t really care, that a govt majority will silence dissent in parliament and that the only real obstacle is the judiciary.
  12. Call a general election and replace the rebels in your party with allies and more useful idiots.
  13. Identify the political correspondents with the biggest egos and flatter them with direct briefings. Cut the rest of them out of the loop completely. Use the bias they create to undermine the credibility of the whole BBC so you are well positioned to dismantle the national media.
  14. Identify the people in the cabinet likely to stand up to you.
  15. Remove them.
  16. Take control of the treasury.
  17. Appoint more of your allies, regardless of how contemptible their views are – after all they accord with your own and there’s hardly anyone left to complain.
  18. Spend a lot of money so that the general public don’t really notice what else is going on. Spend more money. And more.
  19. Meanwhile, use social media to gently normalise topics like eugenics.
  20. Dismantle the judiciary that you have already begun to position as an enemy in the minds of the population.
  21. Quietly reform electoral laws and boundaries to make it harder for an opposition to win. If Scotland and Northern Ireland prove to be too difficult, just let them go.
  22. Job done.

5 thoughts on “How to take over a country (without anyone making a fuss…)

  1. Some omissions worth considering.?
    Devote years to painstakingly dismantling the state education system and gifting it to a ravenous market.
    Punish the remnants of that service with accountability measures on a scale not seen before.
    Insisting that education ‘success’ is defined by the outcomes of excessive testing thereby limiting the capacity of the most vulnerable to question ‘authority’.

    A great piece, so just a suggestion.

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